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J Crew washed trench (SP16, $168) comes in regular 000 – 16 (E8023) and petite (E8252). Color choices are classic navy and light walnut. 55% cotton, 45% lyocell. The trench is unlined. Machine wash. There’s a note about the color possibly transferring to ligher surfaces, so be mindful of that. Maybe it applies more to navy than the light walnut.
Size 6 – My store was sold out of my sizes when I tried it on a few days ago. The regular 6 fit tts, however the sleeves and length are longer than I want them to be. I can get away with a good number of coats in regular size, but I think this one will look best if you get your correct size. Come final sale time, I don’t recommend getting the wrong size and making it work” unless you’re going to get it altered.
The color is more dull irl than it is online. One thing I like is that it doesn’t have a green tint like some of the browns have had. I also think it’s a warm brown, not cool.
The web description says it’s a cotton/Tencel blend. I thought it was going to be flowy, similar to many of the fast fashion trenches that are currently on trend. Also, before I saw it, I thought of the rumpled trench from 2009 or so. It was cute, but I think that coat was too rumpled for me. With those expectations in mind, I wasn’t disappointed that it isn’t structured or polished. In fact, the fabric was sturdier than I expected. It feels like a regular, lightweight trench. Remember that it’s unlined. This is definitely a spring jacket. I’m curious how it would be to travel in, as in flying on an airplane.
A closer look and note the sleeve length in the right pic. It felt more pulled together when I buttoned it and tied the waist. I was trying it on very quickly and didn’t play with the lapels or try to smooth the coat. The epaulets struck me as small (a good thing), even though extend to the shoulder. I usually don’t like epaulets because they shorten my neck length, but I like them on this jacket.
I’m looking forward to receiving the 8P to see what I think of it then. I’ve been chasing this look for years and hoping this trench does it. It’s very casual here in Giants & Raider territory. Also, some of the people I work with are very casual. I’ve been in a number of sessions where the producer is in a t-shirt and jeans. I’m in a schoolboy blazer and they’re asking where I’m going. Uh, here. Work. lol
Note the stock pic color. Not the same irl. Oh, I also like that the buttons are tonal. I usually prefer that over black or brown buttons on tan. Now, when I make it to Burberry trench land, I will probably adore black buttons.
The Feeling
The fabric and casual vibe won’t be for everyone, but I liked it.
ETA: Recvd and love it. Here’s my first OOTD with the trench.
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J Crew Martie pant in gingham (SP16, $98) come in regular 000 – 16 (E9564) and petite P000 – P12 (E9565) . The color is called navy navy (NNA).
Size 6 – These fit tts. I had to fasten the hook-and-eye to get the zipper past the waistband seam, but once I did that they were fine. In short, these fit more tts than the holiday Marties that sized to 8. Perhaps it’s the stretch in these or they corrected the fit. Or both.
The side-zip is not my best friend. I didn’t expect these to be any different. I don’t like to tuck unless they ask me to for work, so I would have no problem always covering the area. The main issue I had cannot be seen in these pics. You see gingham pants, right? Well in-person they looked more like vertical striped pants. Circus, circus, circus flashed in my head. I mentally argued, but the image I kept seeing in the mirror looked like stripe pants. They didn’t look bad like Robin Thicke’s horrible pants he wore when he performed with Miley Cyrus. They just looked more like stripe pants than gingham. I wanted gingham.
Pic on the let is the Marties. The faint, horizontal stripes seem to be very faint. The color is in a herringbone pattern, and yields less color than the Secret Wash shirt in faded gingham on the right. Notice that the horizontal tripes are faded, but not as faded as those on the Marties. Of course the blue is darker on the Marties, making the lighter stripes seem even lighter. There’s less contrast between the blues on the Secret Wash shirt.
The Feeling
Not for me, but I liked them. Good fabric and fit more tts than the holiday Marties.
Similar
The gingham options at Urban Outfitters (closet to J. Crew’s scale) and Talbots (smaller scale print) didn’t make the widget below. The Land’s End pair (2nd from left) look like a winner.
[show_shopthepost_widget id=”1419367″]
The Trench
I was surprised at how divisive the washed trench seemed to be on The Mothership. We don’t have to all like the same things. Trenches traditionally look polished, but we have all sorts of options for garments these days. That said, I don’t think it was the trench that was the issue as much as the undercurrent that ran below the difference of opinion.
I really wish that everyone had just taken Sunny’s advice to let the trench go. People will see what they want to see. My personal past experience is that I kept insisting that my husband does not pay for everything I buy. Not everyone saw the info that G Money was a long standing rap joke between us and not a reference to anything else, but some that did see it believed what they wanted to believe anyway. I guess it was more fun to assume I was a vacuous, bored housewife than accepting my fitting room reviews for what they are — fitting room reviews. I did not say I bought everything, but folks wanted to believe that anyway. I finally stopped trying to explain myself and actions.
In this case, some mentioned that they didn’t see anything negative in the thread on JCA. I can see how some people felt that because they don’t have backstory and/or history. Backstory being all sorts of non-blog conversations that have occured and still do via emails, direct messaging and other methods of communication. Others know full well they see negativity and will state the opposite anyway.
I know for a fact that Rynetta has been bullied. Some of it public and some of it private, sent directly to her. Pretty much what you see is what she is. Yes, she’s very sweet. What you don’t know is that she can be hilarious. She has cracked me up quite often, offline. She’s really honest, sharp and witty. What you do know is she loves J. Crew. She thinks the things she buys are “amazing” and, unlike me, she’s not a returner. She chooses to not talk about items she dislikes or passes on and people assume that she buys every single thing she sees in the store. Well, what if she does?
What. If. She Does.
Just because she has a Ph. D. doesn’t mean she has to methodically or systematically break down what she buys in the way you “think” someone with a Ph. D. should write. From what I gather, shopping is a release for her. As for many of us, J. Crew is her happy place. If that’s what she wants it to be or that’s how her lifestyle is…(shrug)… I think she pretty much gets on, shares her stuff, interacts with people quite a bit and that’s it. What anyone thinks of how she “should” do it…well, it’s not up to them. It’s up to her.
In general, what I fail to understand is why people absolutely have to be negative and/or mean. I don’t like everything I see online. I don’t agree with all of the things I see online. Instead of picking my fingers up and hovering them over my computer or telephone keyboard to “voice my opinion” or share my thoughts, I simply move on. If the person has asked for feedback and I hope to help, I will share my thoughts and try to be nice about it. If they are just sharing an outfit and I don’t like it, I move on. Why spread negativity? I’ve read that people who put themselves online are subject to just as much criticism as they are praise and should accept it as a part of being online. I highly doubt anyone puts themselves online to be put down. So why do it?
The trench is on it’s way to me. Didn’t buy the pants. Going to take a nap.
ETA: It looks like some of this still isn’t making sense. Let me say it another way. There’s a lot of gossip that goes on in direct messaging, texting, phone calls and emails. Probably via owls and smoke signals, too. So when certain comments show up in blogs or Instagram, they aren’t always what they seem. Sometimes there’s a backstory and those who are part of the backstory can read between the lines. Some of those lines have jibs and jabs.
So. If you think that you can’t make a negative comment about a garment, that’s not my point. My sentiments have more to do with the bullying that many people haven’t seen.
COMMENTS HAVE BEEN CLOSED
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Great reviews, Gigi. I’m not totally sold on the casualness of the trench. I still like to look pulled together.
Hope the 8P fits you!
Have a great week. 🙂
Hey JSR, that’s right. The casualness is not for everyone. It’s nice that there’s an alternative for those that don’t have a need for the look or function (lined, etc) of the Icon. I’m not even 100% sure it will work for me & the clothes I own. It’s the tan that’s been particularly tricky to nail in my years long trench search. Thanks for commenting 🙂
Thanks Gigi for your reviews. I think I am also done commenting on JCA. I never thought for a moment, I was hurting someone feelings by giving a negative opinion on my thoughts on a piece of clothing but maybe I was. So I will take your suggestion and not comment at all, good, bad or indifferent. Take care.
JRSConifer – Thx for chiming in! IMO, I don’t think anyone needs to go anywhere or stop commenting. I didn’t say that at all.
Different viewpoints are good. My sentiments are an accumulation of things that go beyond this trench. My sentiments don’t make sense to the people who aren’t perpetuating a problem. It’s not about disagreeing. It’s about passive aggressive attacks disguised as disagreement. I didn’t want to think they were there, but they started showing up before that particular thread.
Of course we can respectfully disagree about things. Absolutely. People have been really mean to Rynetta. It’s been in other spaces and seems to be growing. That was my major concern.
Thanks so much for so eloquently posting this. I’ve been a long-time follower of both yours and Rynetta’s blogs and love both of your style, taste and reviews. I only recently began commenting on JCA after years of being a fly on the wall, and to be honest, it’s comments like what were displayed on the trench thread that have always made me hesitant to join in the discussion. I think what bothered me the most was not so much the comments themselves, because some of them were thoughtful and constructive, but the mob mentality pile-on that ensued.
It’s one thing to criticize a company for a declining quality, fit, customer service, etc, but it’s entirely another to make disparaging comments about someone’s actual outfit that they are actually wearing. I mean, seriously, would some of those comments be made to a casual acquaintance in real life? I highly doubt it, and if so, respect, civility and manners are actually quite lovely things that need to be employed more often.
Violet: you’re super sweet, thank you SO much!
Hi Violet. I’ve always likened forums and blogs to double dutch. You see the ropes twirling and don’t know quite when to jump in. In that way, I completely understand being a lurker in a community. You don’t want to stop the ropes. lol
Thank you for the wonderful compliments. We are definitely losing respect, civility and manners as we clack away at our keyboards. It used to be that any adult (non-parent) could tell children how to behave and most would be mindful. From that point in time and onward, we listened to others. Not anymore and certainly you can’t tell no one nothin’ about what they post online because free speech, self-expression and all that.
There *should* be boundaries.
Thanks for chiming in !
That’s too bad about the way things came around in the comment area. I hope people don’t go away, though.
I can see where you’re coming from with those pants not looking like a true gingham. I didn’t notice that until you mentioned it. Maybe the vertical stripe thing is actually pretty cool. (I tend to avoid patterned pants, not sure why.)
The khaki color is tough for me to wear, so I won’t be trying on the trench. I already have a navy one I got from Banana Republic that I really like, so I’m ready for Spring once again. (It’s lined, is double breasted, nice lapels, and epaulets – all the criteria I was looking for a few years ago.) Anyway, hope the Petite works out for you!
Hi Vava. As usual, J. Crew has taken a fun twist on a regular item. I think the pattern play is neat, but it just didn’t look how I wanted online. There are other retailers with gingham pants. I’m sure I’ll try one or two of them in the future. I’ll have to go back and add the ones I found into this post.
So glad I read your review of the gingham Martie. I see what you mean by it looking more like a striped pant, hadn’t realized that. Not saying that I won’t be ordering it, I just might, but good to know.
And as always: love your reviews!!
Fleur de Lys – It’s funny that the gingham pants don’t photograph the way they looked irl. The pattern looks the same in my pictures as they do online. I can’t say I won’t order them either (lol), but I’m thinking I can find something else with a better fit across the middle if I do look for gingham.
Two basic philosophies of everyday living: ‘do unto others…’ and ‘if you can’t say something nice…’ You are right to note that many of us who read JCA casually really do not know about backstories, snipes or stab-in-the-back-stories; it’s terribly upsetting to see such fallout happen, though. I know that the basic problem with written commentary is that tone is often misread, but I gather from your analysis that there may be more to it than that, and it makes me sad. No one deserves that. Whether I personally dislike some piece of clothing is irrelevant if someone else loves it, and I can’t imagine saying anything about it (not even in person, not even to my own sister – only my mom gets to do that lol). Nor can I judge how they spend their time or their money – both belong to them, not me. Who am I to judge what others gain pleasure from – glass houses, right? Like one of your other commenters, it does rather put me off being part of a comment board, even tangentially, as negativity tends to linger. I hope this episode won’t be repeated.
On a totally different note, I see what you mean about the gingham pants – now stripes are all I can see! Last summer Loft did a much nicer version imo, in a slightly larger check. They seemed to be universally flattering, kind of hoping they will do a remake this year in another colour.
Thanks for being such a thoughtful and well-thinking soul. And for sharing clothing pics and reviews as well, of course: in spite of everything, it’s always enjoyable to pop by here and see you.
Poettodesign – I love everything you said. YOU are thoughtful, well-thinking and eloquent. When I sense myself feeling lack because of things I see on Instagram or whatever else online, I get off of it. Maybe more time-outs are needed for a lot of ppl. lol
Now let’s hope Loft releases gingham pants this year. You know I loooove their jeans, so the pants might work just as well. Speaking of Loft bottoms, they also do their print shorts and lace shorts in 4″ inseam, which is nice.
Thanks for visiting
Hi Gigi
I browse through the site, but, perhaps naively, was not aware of any bullying. It always seemed like a pretty supportive site to me. Some of us were honestly scratching our heads and wondering what all the fuss was about on that particular thread. I find rynetta’s positive review style and love of the crew quite nice personally. I’ve made some great purchases of things I may not have without seeing them on her. I also do learn from the more critical eyes of people on jca. It’s helped point things out to me that i may not have noticed about fabric, length etc. They all help me.
I know I definitely don’t have the thick skin needed to be a review blogger. I admire people who can do it in spite of the negative commentary that comes with it. It must wear one down a bit. Thanks to you, rynetta and everyone who keeps at it!
Now I will go back to taking my own advice and am going to “let it go” !
🙂
Sunnyyyyy…our whistle blower (in a good way). Our truce maker. You tried. It was beautifully attempted. 😉
I know ppl had no idea why there would be such heated conflict about a coat, but yep, there’s backstory — not on JCA, but on other places online. And yes, it does get tiring as a blogger. It’s a vulnerable feeling to have someone undermine your personal life…like try to get you fired, create streams of negativity about you online, etc…
We can definitely “Elsa this” and move on. My daughter has. It’s all about My Little Pony now. Let’s take up their motto; Friendship is magic. 😉
Gigi, big high five! I’ve loved your blog for years and I love it more so now that I know who you are. I’ve seen you in a training video at my former employer :). Aside from helping me buy a couple pairs of shoes and outfits based upon your reviews, you’ve been someone I’ve cheered on quietly in the background and a topic of conversation with my sister in terms of your honesty and wit. You lift me up on days when I have people pulling against me at my demanding job. Please keep being you!
Colleen – Love those corporate videos! It’s interesting to see the problems companies have and the way they choose communicate solutions to employees. Thank you for sharing that I’ve been a good source of distraction on occasion. That’s cool. 🙂
I like seeing what Rynetta buys and wears and it’s great she gets to to Fashion week, who else gets to…..
Kate
Kate, yes what an amazing experience to go to NYFW. Perhaps one day… 🙂
Gigi, I never even comment on blogs anymore, but two thumbs up to this post and for defending a friend. It speaks volumes of your stellar character. I suspect a few naysayers are passively aggressively peeved that Rynetta got to attend NYFW (again!) and are jealous of her awesomeness. Love both of you!
Gigi – I am one of the people that didn’t think there was anything mean said on JCA. If the issue is with GOMI (wild guess since that’s the only place I have seen really mean things said in this kind of context), why not take it up there? Some long-time JCAers now feel disengaged, which isn’t right.
I have been on the other side of this — when I commented on IG about likeit when @emmeltwins decided to join. There, I didn’t say anything mean (and certainly @emmeltwins didn’t think I did either) but I was lambasted for essentially stating my belief — which is that the monetization of IG changes the conversation, and, for the worse, IMO (and that there are legal risks). People privately reached out to me to say that they agreed and that I was brave for speaking my mind.
I think the pendulum has swung too far the other direction. It really does seem like if you express a different view (and these are clothes after all, and we are grown women), the message is that it is not allowed.
FWIW, I don’t mind the trench.
rcbshops – I do agree that it’s “just clothes,” but it becomes way more than that when ppl send threatening private messages via direct message and/or via email. You didn’t do that and I’m not suggesting you did. My point is how far people take their dislike.
I wasn’t even thinking about you or the ltk discussion when I shared my thoughts here. Not at all. But I’ll discuss. I understood your viewpont about ltk. However, you brought up the law and changed the url in your Instagram handle to an FTC link. You’re a laywer, so maybe it’s regular conversation for you, but it seemed aggressive. If you have information you want to share to help your online friends protect themselves, that’s great. It didn’t come across that way, imo. I don’t think it was you having a differing opinion and getting attacked for it. I think non-lawyers get nervous when lawyers start bringing up the law and that was the response. I can see how the response felt mob like, though. I welcome more conversation about it offline if you wish.
Blogging and online life has changed so much since we all started connecting. There are many things I love and some that I don’t like at all. I try to just roll with it. We haven’t met irl, but I always liked our back-and-forth about clothes and never felt — from my end — that it needed to cease.
We will see about the trench. rofl Watch me hate it when it gets here. lol
Your take on the likeit discussion is interesting, but doesn’t match my recollection. I chose to disengage from that element of IG, and that’s been fine for me. But that mob mentality (all under the guise of being supportive to the perceived-maligned), could be considered a form of bullying too.
Unless the accusation is that Desert Flower or others on JCA are the people who have sent Rynetta threatening emails, etc., I am still not sure I understand why anything said on JCA was mean. It’s not mean to say that one doesn’t like the trench or finds it cheap-looking. That can’t possibly be the standard.
Rcb: I do not expect you to understand why I thought that the comments were mean. As evidenced in our ltk discussion, you’re committed to seeing things your way. And, that is totally fine. I never said that it’s mean for someone to say they do not like something. It’s a trench, not a matter of life and death. However, it is mean to veer in the direction of attacking an individual. And, I am not the only person who felt that way. That is how I felt, and I am certainly entitled to feel the way I feel. In the end, you do not know me (and none of the people on the deplorable site you referenced above know me), so I will continue to live the life that I love. I hope that you can do the same!
I have a pretty good life, thanks. I’m not sure why I deserved that jab about not understanding your viewpoint — I merely said that *I* didn’t read anything in a mean way and that I did not understand what was mean. I did not say anything about knowing you, nor did I pretend to know you.
And, I also don’t understand why the likeit discussion means that I am committed to seeing things my way. As I said, my recollection of that IG interaction is different than what you and Gigi seem to remember (although I suppose anyone could find it if s/he were so interested), but here’s how it went from my perspective: I made a snarky/meant-to-be-funny comment about @emmeltwins joining the “dark side” when she started doing likeit; I was immediately called out by many people for being non-supportive, even though @emmeltwins did not take the comment that way; I then explained my reasons for not liking likeit (monetizes the IG conversation thereby changing it; lack of transparency); I did not change my mind when people told me they use likeit because it’s easier to let followers know they bought something up front as opposed to answering lots of questions about an item (because that explanation is not particularly persuasive to me); I decided to unfollow certain people on IG (including you, yes) because I was surprised at the mob mentality that was quick to shut me down. Yes, I did post the FTC guidelines in my IG profile; yes, I am a lawyer, and no, I don’t find anything aggressive about that.
I get that you find the JCA comments mean, still not sure why, other than the fact that there has been lots of stuff happening in the background (which I don’t doubt, never have). But why leave the insinuation out there that Desert Flower is somehow responsible for that? We can give lip service to wanting people to feel free to disagree, but, frankly, it just seems like lip service.
Rcb: it wasn’t a jab, but there is no winning with you. I never suggested that Desert Flower was responsible for anything. I’m done discussing this with you.
I was dismayed to see the misunderstanding on JCA carry over here. I have reread the posts many times and I honestly do not see anything mean or personal in any of them. I am truly sorry that was the way some posts were interpreted. People can and do bully others on the internet, that is true. I do know that viewing things through a lens of perceived persecution can lead one to see malice where there is none and react to it. Frankly, that is almost as harmful as the behavior they were seeking to avoid.
No more JCA for me, and now no more Gigi’s Gone Shopping. It makes me sad but if people truly believe I bullied someone, and I so thoroughly disagree, I don’t see any way to mend that.
I’ve really enjoyed visiting your blog over the years, Gigi. I wish you the best with it, and your acting career. I look forward to seeing you on the screen.
Desert Flower – It just so happened that I tried on the trench on the same day that the hullabaloo erupted. I didn’t want to keep talking on JCA about it and chose to elaborate here in my own space. I hear you on perceived persecution and I’ve often had to ask myself if someone is trying to help, make a joke, is being sarcastic or otherwise. It’s not easy to tell tone, particularly if it’s someone new that I’m interacting with.
Years ago I saw some comments in a thread on my personal FB page and thought they were racist. I looked at the commenter’s friends (all white, except 1 or 2) and took her comments for how I saw them thru my lens. Turns out she was being sarcastic. I was mortified that I had judged someone I didn’t know, bolstering my case thru what I saw in her friends list. Moreover, I realized that I don’t always know the relationship between two people and I don’t always need to come to the defense of my friend or relative. I shut my page down. I was pregnant with Mini G (hormones!) and just decided it was for the best since I didn’t know how to interact, right? lol I didn’t open it for 4 years. I’m back on there again and I’m still not a fan of it. It’s election season, so there are numerous blanket announcements (I’m leaving FB!) and dramatic unfriending.
I’m rambling. In short, yes, there has been nastiness both direct and in private messages. It’s probably something that needed to be talked about. But don’t leave. I mean, you have to do what you want, but I think everyone should stay and hang out.
I hope Desert Flower doesn’t leave.
I also think it’s a bit unfortunate that this spilled over, not because I think the conversation is bad, but because I don’t think it is supportive of the ideals you’re talking about. I think when folks tried to apologize or clarify their actions, having a post they had to stumble upon, instead of one that is linked to in the original conversation, feels more like being “gossiped” about. I don’t see how that is any more constructive or polite.
My two cents is that time and place is relevant whether your on the internet or in real life. I would never offer my unsolicited opinion of someone’s outfit at the office or on the street, but I would be very direct and even sarcastic (cause that is my sense of humor) with my friends or sales associates at a store or just chatting about fashion during a work break. It’s same on the internet. If I’m on a blog about queer parenting, I’m not going to comment on someone’s outfit, but I feel like on JCrew Aficionada it’s appropriate, as well as blogs that specially do fashion reviewing. I wouldn’t even comment necessarily on lookbook fashion type blogs, other than to say how great someone looks or ask how the fits runs.
I think to paint us all as rude or inconsiderate is a bit of a stretch and it’s awful that Rynetta has been bullied, but assuming that everyone has that intention isn’t correct either. It would never do that. I have neither the time or inclination for that level of negativity. I just enjoy breaking down the details of clothing. If you knew me in real life, you’d know I do that to my own things. I’m the person who takes 40 minutes to decide to buy one shirt.
I’m not into drama and if there is a lot happening I certainly don’t want to contribute or be a part of it, so it might be for the best to bow out. This is supposed to be fun.
Hi Jessie. Me writing about this as a continued conversation is no different than other times I’ve expanded on topics that originated on JCA (hello, “end of the white card”!). Also, my thoughts weren’t restricted to that thread. My thoughts are about some of the general things that have been going on that have nothing to do with clothes and are are personal attacks.
I respectfully disagree that I’ve painted everyone as rude or inconsiderate. I don’t see that in the text. It’s something you inferred. Perhaps I could’ve ensured that people would understand that by stating “this doesn’t apply to everyone,” but I specifically chose not to. If what I said doesn’t apply to you, then you shouldn’t see yourself as a part of the problem. Harassment has happened elsewhere. Rarely on JCA. What I know for sure is that when folks are contacting me privately to complain about someone’s fashiong consumption or share judgement about a post on someone’s Instagram, there’s a problem.
I *want* to spend 40 min with you talking about a shirt. I promise to ‘gently mention that you already have 5 of them if I know you well enough to do so 😉
So I’m inferring, but you are all justified in your opinions, with no bias or misunderstanding. Okay.
I used I, because I could not see a distinction between what I wrote and anything anyone else wrote. It all appeared civil to me. I don’t see myself as a problem, but you all clearly have drama that goes beyond anything I understand or want to engage in. I don’t want to be accused of accidentally doing something because I tread on something I didn’t have the history for. Honestly I have never encountered anything like this. It’s usually trolls or adults conducting themselves maturely and ignoring the few offensive people, like life.
Honestly this post seems like “DRAMA–you justifying the person who’s feeling were hurt–and all this overanalyzing…but if “GIGI SAYS..then it must be so, right? more classy to have just left it alone and not say anything IMO–or do the post as a general discussion and not b/c you feel the need to validate someone. Rynetta is a positive person–and I honestly took the comment made by the other person in a positive light–J. Crew is all about wearing and liking some different things that others may not be keen to or attracted to. Sometimes bloggers do buy/review things that I never would’ve looked twice at and then purchased. Rynetta styled the trench great and is one of those items that got more of my attention than at first glance. To be honest–that was my initial interpretation of DF’S comment–until ALL THIS…
I am glad to see this discussion. As noted, it is difficult to know what a poster’s tone and intention are with blogging. The important and helpful part is having a dialogue and exchange about our communications and how they affect relationships. I personally find that more compelling than clothing reviews. That would not have been appropriate to continue in the JCA trench coat discussion. Perhaps what is missing here is Rynetta’s point of view and a more detailed response to what was troubling for her – but certainly not to make anyone “wrong” or to discourage them from blogging/posting. That is Rynetta’s call and I support her decision to discuss further online or not. I guess my point here is that I hope folks don’t stop posting because of feedback issues. All the voices I read today on this post have something worthwhile to add to the discussion.
SE Mom, I really appreciate your comments! I will post my thoughts as soon as I get to my laptop, but for now, I will say this. I absolutely do NOT mind disagreement when it’s civil. The disagreement started out that way, but then the comments about my overly postitive reviews in general started moving the conversation in a different direction, I think. I’m a positive person about everything, and I will not apologize for that. More later!
While I missed the trench comments on JCA site, I saw some of the bullying of Rynetta on Instragram and felt bad for her. I agree that unless someone is asking for feedback, don’t post negative remarks. Please just move on. I love your and Rynetta’s blogs and Instagram posts!
Lila: I really appreciate it! I hope that you’re having a terrific Tuesday!
Lila, thank you for the lovely comments. 🙂
Hi Gigi, I just wanted to say that I’m glad you broached this topic and that you filled us in on where some of this coming from, and about some of the backstory, of some of the things that have happened in the past, on other blogs/sites, personal messages, etc. I think it’s a good reminder to everyone to yes, offer your opinions by all means, but to also be super mindful of what is being said (especially when tone can often be misconstrued among virtual strangers on the internet.) Sometimes I’d just rather not say anything at all, at the risk of potentially hurting someone’s feelings, you know what I mean? Ack. I wish the comments had stopped after Sunny’s eloquent first comment, which I thought was a good way of addressing a quickly derailing train.
In any case, thanks for the reviews as always, they’re always a fun and helpful read. Still waiting on that tipped cable sweater, will let you know what I think of it!
Hi Tati. Yes, tone is everything and not only are we missing the auditory, we’re missing the visual of seeing the person and reading body language. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
The sweater is online only, so I’m banking on you to share what you think 😉
GiGi!
I always appreciate the honesty and $0.02 you bring to this corner of the internet! I’m not an active member of JCA, so I’ll just leave it at: you do you. Plain and simple.
To throw another trench option out there: Everlane! https://www.everlane.com/collections/womens-outerwear
Hey, Lauren K. I appreciate the support! That’s a good looking trench. The lapels are to wide for me, personally. I finally honed in on my ideal coat details by making ‘mistakes’ with a few of them. Thankfully mostly F21 and only one J. Crew. 😉
people can be very mean– especially if they feel they can do it anon. If you don’t have anything nice or constructive to say– keep it moving. It is really an easy thing to do — I promise.
Mean people stink.
Connieeeeee, y…creating fake accounts to harass and threaten ppl. No bueno.
In other news, I’m feeling particularly awesome today and hope you are, too!
Wow! It’s said to see that a simple review over a coat has gone to this. I don’t see any problem with two people disagreeing on a item, but there are some things that are better left unsaid or quite frankly don’t need to be said at all. I love both of your blogs and I’m glad to see that you both are supporting each other! = )