You know how they say you shouldn’t drive when you’re emotional? The same rule should probably apply for blogging, but I’m going for it anyway. Storytime, glaydies…
I love the swap/exchange on The Mothership. If you’re new to that blog, this one or other Mothership inspired blogs, I’ll ease into this. On Sunday nites at 9pm, the blog owner Alexis (love her!) posts a thread for people who have J Crew items to sell and another thread for people to post J Crew items they are seeking. It has been such a fantastic experience for me!!!! However, with good there is also contrast and with that I’ll introduce my first gripe.
When I am in the For Sale thread, I don’t really caaaare about Rock & Republic jeans (random pick). I usually just skip those posts, but on some days I’m not in the mooood to sift through the non-J Crew items even if they *are* presented along with J Crew items. Learn to use Ebay. Another thing I don’t like is sorting through are “shout outs” to so-and-so for a ‘great transaction.’ There is no way to keep record of this like Ebay feedback, so why clog up the thread. And only a couple of times have we heard bad stories, which leads me to why I’m venting. Wait. I know someone is going to get all hung up on ‘What bad story, Gigi’ so I’ll share the one I know. A buyer purchased something and never received it. The seller was not named. The buyer was upset and wanted advice on how to proceed. I don’t think she named the seller.This was over a year ago, I believe, and if I recall…it was thought that the seller may have received a money order, but claimed to never have recieved it so s/he never shipped the merch. So the buyer was out the money. I dunno what happened with that. My point is that bad stories are far & few between if any. As a result, there has been trust created thru many happy sales/swaps. Moving on.
I had a couple previous transactions with one JCA in particular. About a month or two ago, she & I had an email discussion about an item that I was planning on returning to J Crew. I purchased it on sale, but it went down to an even lower price. She asked if I would put it on hold for her at the time of return so she could have it charged and sent from the store to her. We’re talking a $148 item down to $40. I was happy to do so. I returned it and texted her from the store. She later emailed & let me know that she called the store and had it sent to her without incident. BTW, don’t let me get into the questions I answered for her about other items. Not a big deal, but currently irritating as well so they now count as favors because when I decide to make the kit, I throw in all the kaboodle.
So last week she wanted to buy a jacket that I was going to return. We agreed to do the transaction thru Paypal. She never asked me to return it to the store as we’d done w/the other item. This was great for me and no pressure to get to the store (although I visited today – empty!). She asked me to mail the jacket late in the week because she’ll be out of town and wants to receive it early next week. She Paypal’d me on Sunday, said thanks, yay, etc… I let her know I recvd the money and would be mailing it this Fri. Well today, Wed, I get an email saying she wants to canx the transaction. She found a J Crew for jacket in-store for cheaper and there is another J Crew jacket she already owns that she doesn’t wear enough. I was irritated.
Of course I could sit here and argue her side…she has the right to change her mind since I haven’t shipped yet (by her request) and whatever else her point of view might offer…but I don’t want to do that. I want to vent. I think this is particularly irritating because there are a number of things that have previously bugged me in general (not with her) that I just try to shrug off. Like…uh…invoicing people for items they say they want to purchase, never to hear from them again. Like never ever. Just disappear. That’s fine, I guess, since some people can’t deal with anything remotely resembling confrontation, but not cool if I’ve told other people the item has sold and then the transaction doesn’t go through. And not cool if I spent extra time out of my day. I guess that makes me a sucker.
For the record, I didn’t just post this to talk trash. I’ve already responded & let the buyer know I was disappointed in her request, esp after doing the dress return for her. And I also said that this eroded the trust I felt we had created online. Of course I’m returning her money. After all this you’re probably thinking this would be sooooo great, not to mention dramatic, if I go ahead and out her username. What’s the point. She can always post under another name. I think this was just a bad day for me in general. I had someone else take advantage of me earlier. I don’t like ppl that play the victim role so I never sign up for that. These things made me realize just how many things I tend to let slide so I don’t come off like an a–. You know what Barbara Streisand said in that great luncheon speech about how differently womens’ behavior is perceived over mens.’ If men voice their opinion, they’re taking a stand. If women do the same thing, they’re a b—- or worse.
I’m realizing there are levels with this blogging stuff. I thought once you get your first haterade post you get over the little bit of hurt and say, ‘I made it! I’m popular!’ But apparently or inevitably there is a point where you are forced to throw out a vent. I support those I’ve seen, but never thought I’d do one. I’m done.
You are welcome to chime in. The space is yours to share any vent you want.